Thursday 3 September 2020 by Lucas Wilde

Western governments horrified by latest Russian poisoning which they will do nothing about


Dominic Raab tells Russians off

Everyone from every government which isn’t Russian has expressed their horror at the latest poisoning of someone who opposes the Russian regime, which they will forget about in a week or two having done nothing about it.

German scientists have confirmed that Russian opposition politician, Alexei Navalny, was poisoned with a Novichok nerve agent.

”This is a disgraceful act by the Russian government, of whom we are all absolutely terrified,” confirmed Westminster spokesperson, Simon Williams.

”Therefore, we will be expressing our disgust in the strongest possible terms, and our action on the matter will begin and indeed end there.

”We all drink a LOT of tea at Westminster and none of us fancy encountering a glowing one at any point down the line.

”So hopefully this stern telling off in particular will be enough to get M. Putin to change his ways.

“58th time’s a charm and all that.”

Russian government spokesperson, Simonski Williamski, said “Oh no, the West is CROSS. Deary me.

”For the record, Russia has never poisoned anybody and never will poison anybody, and we have the greatest respect for the governments of the West.

“But off the record? hahaha you can’t stop us.”

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