Donald Trump evacuated from White House briefing room for his own protection after reporter asks him to count to ten

author avatar by 4 years ago

Donald Trump was evacuated from the White House press briefing room last night after it was determined that a reporter’s request for the president to count to ten on live television represented “a clear and present danger” to his approval rating.

Trump was evacuated from the room immediately upon being asked by a CNN reporter if he could prove to the American people that he has the mental capacity to count to ten, without using his fingers.

Our American correspondent, Chuck Williams, told us, “The secret service reacted like lightning. As soon as a reported asked the President about his grasp of second-grade mathematics, they reported ‘shots fired’ and bundled him out of there before his approval rating could come to any harm.

“Faced with a withering barrage of questions like how the three times table works, naming three things that are blue, and counting how many Americans have died from Covid-19, the Presidential bodyguard took the decision to evacuate the commander in Chief before things were made worse by him actually attempting to answer.

“They clearly train for situations like this, and their response completely as you’d expect, and thanks to their bravery, the President was never in any danger of actually answering any of the questions.”

NewsThump Best sellers

The president returned to the room sometime later, to complete the press conference, however, the chair of the reporter in question was left suspiciously empty for the remainder of the question and answer session.

Make Orwell Fiction Again – get the perfect 2020 T-shirt here!