Man, 35, considering career change; doesn’t consult grandmother

Simon Williams, 35, of London, has decided to move to a new house and look for a different job, amidst cries of horror that he didn’t first consult with his grandmother, father, stepmother, aunts and uncles.

The tabloid media are calling his decision ‘unconscionable’.

Gavin Jones, of West Yorkshire says, “I mean – can he even still be considered part of the family? I heard he may also be spending some time in America.

“Just because his wife is from there, doesn’t mean they should be visiting regularly. Certainly not without checking with his brother and gran first.”

Jack and Vanessa Collins, of Redcar, both also in their 30s, state, “Jack had a job offer in Birmingham earlier last year. But sadly, we had a cousin that wasn’t keen, so we decided to stay put. I mean, that’s just the way it is, isn’t it?”

Simon and wife Joan are actually hoping to make enough money to no longer require financial support from their family; extreme aspirations for any millennial. It is not yet known whether this will be a practical possibility.

Joan told us, “Well, I remembered to tell my mum. Boys are so disorganised, aren’t they?”