Friday 14 June 2019 by Neil Tollfree

Andrea Leadsom to return to the late 1950s


Andrea Leadsom returns to 1950s

Following her failed Tory leadership attempt, former Leader of the House of Commons Andrea Leadsom is set to return to the late 1950s.

Despite existing in the modern world for some years now, Leadsom has often seemed confused and a little frightened by societal advancements and returning to the late 1950s will see her in an environment she finds much more comfortable.

“Seeing Great Britain in the 2010s has been a fascinating experience,” explained Leadsom, after packing her trunk and loading up her charabang.

“But the late 1950s just make more sense to me.

“The cheery milkman delivering the morning pint, cricket on the village green, and homosexuality being a desperate, furtive activity that was kept firmly out of sight of normal decent folk.

“Black people knowing their place. I mean, I’ve nothing against the blacks. Some of them can be quite hard-working, but in the late 1950s, they knew their place and treated you with respect.

“I was left alone in a room with Sam Gyimah the other day, you know. I don’t mind admitting the experience was more than a little frightening.

“No, the late 1950s is where I belong and I look forward to returning.”

It is expected that after returning to the late 1950s, Ms Leadsom will use her political skill to set up a jam drive for the local W.I.

There is currently no indication that Jacob Rees-Mogg intends to return to the 1870s or that Mark Francois plans to head back to whatever planet he came from.

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