Queen to seek asylum in Ecuadorian Embassy during Donald Trump’s state visit

Buckingham Palace officials have contacted the Ecuadorian Embassy to ask if their spare room will be available for the duration of Donald Trump’s forthcoming state visit.

Trump, who will be descending upon the country in June, is expected to want to meet the Queen during his visit and she has already requested Royal Equerries make plans to ensure that doesn’t happen.

Ecuador is understood to be ‘amenable’ to the request on the condition that she doesn’t bring Prince Philip.

“The Ecuadorian Ambassador told us that he’s got plenty of experience in dealing with house guests trying to avoid the Americans, but unlike the last guy Her Majesty knows how to flush a toilet and is kind to cats,” said Sir Simon Williams KCMG.

“Her Majesty has also promised not to try and undermine the internal politics of any sovereign states whilst she’s there, as she’s got enough on with people trying that at home at the moment.

“And as far as we know Donald Trump isn’t planning to stay for seven years, so they’ll be able to launder the bedding after a few days as well which is seen as a plus.”

When told there would be a heavy police presence, a spokesman for the Ecuadorian Embassy said that would be fine as they’d got used to that over the last few years.