Cabinet crisis as PM hesitantly frowns at Boris Johnson over ‘f*ck business’ remark

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Westminster observers have been speculating that the Foreign Secretary’s gaffes have finally caught up with him after his insulting comments alienated the whole entire community and prompted an unprecedented display of mild irritation from Theresa May.

Although no minister wished to go on the record, several have described an unusually tense Cabinet meeting. It appears the day started off in the usual manner with Mr Johnson blocking all discussion until everyone had read the press clippings mentioning him, but Mrs May stunned the room by looking at the ceiling and exhaling loudly.

Simon Williams, the chief political editor of the Daily Telegraph, explained that this was the most severe rebuke to date for the bumbling head of the Foreign Office.

He continued. “This is huge. Normally Boris could drunkenly call the Pope a mackerel snapper and she’d immediately go on Andrew Marr to defend him as if he was a teenager recovering from cancer and not a career politician trained from birth to walk in the corridors of power.

“The oddest thing is that by his standards, this wasn’t actually a bad week. Sure, he told business to fuck off but at least he wasn’t using archaic racist terminology.

“And he expressed admiration for Trump, but it’s perfectly natural for him to admire another untrustworthy lecher rising to a level way beyond his abilities.”

Mr Williams also speculated that Theresa May would have been emboldened by Mr Johnson’s falling popularity among the party faithful.

A recent MORI poll revealed that 74% of Tory voters thought the most accurate term to describe Boris Johnson was “insufferable twat”.