Rick Astley giving you up for Lent

author avatar by 6 years ago

Despite previous assurances, Rick Astley has confirmed he will be giving you up for Lent.

Astley, who rose to fame on a pledge of his eternal fidelity, has left fans ‘gutted’ with the announcement which is expected to commence immediately and last for forty days and forty nights.

A statement from his agent went on to say that the singer would spend his time until Easter letting you down, running around and deserting you, before trying to make it all better by buying a box of chocs and some wilted flowers from a service station.

“For the next six weeks I’m going to make you cry, say goodbye, tell a lie and desert you, and I’ve got to say I’m really looking forward to it,” Astley told fans.

“We’ve known each other for so long – it’s been thirty years for God’s sake and frankly a bit of time to myself would really help clear my head and get some space.

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“So don’t you ask me how I’m feeling. I’m glad I can finally take some time off from not giving you up and go to the pub for a few weeks, like a normal bloke.

“See you at Easter.”

Long-term fans of Rick said that he’d promised ‘full commitment’, and this was hardly what they’d been led to expect.

“If he doesn’t think again fast I’ll start following Glenn Medeiros instead,” one told us.

“He promised that nothing is gonna change his love for me so I reckon I’m still in there if I fancy it.”