I’m not going on and on at you, says your wife, while going on and on at you

author avatar by 6 years ago

Your wife has definitely not been going on and on at you for the past 20 minutes while trapped in an infinite loop of subordinate clauses, it has emerged.

“I’m just saying, it would be better for the relationship if we could, like we used to do before the children are back from school – because we need to start communicating better, unless you just want to be like lodgers living in the same place, which is probably all you can cope with,” said Simone Williams, your wife.

“It’s all very well just going out and amusing yourself with your football and your music concerts and your nights with your friends but the important thing, and I’ve said this before, it’s not rocket science, is like how I don’t see Nigel from down the road disappearing out of the house two evenings a week and Susan said he’s so handy around the house and is always buying her flowers and telling her how much he loves her and you NEVER say that, I’m getting tired of this now, keeping on having to tell you but it’s high time you grew up and got your finger out and manned up and started giving time to the relationship, the children will leave one day and where are we going to be by then, so if you want to just end up like your parents, and I know they never liked me, so don’t bother pretending, you’re just like them and that’s why the children are just like you too, but I’m tired of having to do everything in the relationship,” she added.

“And don’t talk over me,” she continued, “You’re always talking over me with a stony silence, just like your father. And before you start on and on about how I’m going on and on, I wouldn’t have to if you just did your bit and stopped overtalking me.

“What?”