A new bath bomb designed for men will kill anyone that tries to use it.
After up to three men with top-knots demanded that they should have their own bath bombs without having to pop into Lush, designers at Well ‘Ard Stuff for Well ‘Ard Bastards came up with a solution.
“Baths are for poofs, and it’s vital that we remind you of that,” said CEO, Simon Williams, spitting his tobacco into a nearby hollowed-out skull.
“Nonetheless, some of you want bath bombs. So we’ve given you an actual bomb or, more accurately, a hand grenade.
“It will kill you and anyone in the rooms below you if you choose to use it, and it doesn’t get more manly than that.
“It will serve you right for opting for a bath over a proper manly shower where you can shave and listen to Meatloaf out of one of our Well ‘Ard Waterproof Speakers for Tough Pricks.”
Beta male, Jay Cooper, said, “I hoped it would smell of mahogany or something.
“But I tried it the other day and now the only smell is death, after the floor caved in and killed my grandfather who was asleep on the sofa below.
“..it was cool though.”