Stable genius Donald Trump has demonstrated his outstanding mental acuity by forgetting the words to the Star-Spangled Banner.
Trump was unable to recite the national anthem at a college football championship game, much to the dismay of his team who have spent the last week trying to convince the American public that he is as sharp as a tack.
However, Trump himself was quick to defend his apparent brain fade, telling his Twitter followers, “I have a great memory. The best memory. I know all the words, just not necessarily in the right order.”
White House officials have been quick in their efforts to spin the apparent disrespect as nothing more than Trump being Trump and sticking one in the eye of the establishment.
Communications Director Sarah Sanders told reporters, “Some of you will argue that taking a knee during the national anthem is no more disrespectful than looking around while reciting to yourself what appears to be a grocery shopping list. We would refute that assertion.
“What you are seeing is not a man forgetting the words to a song he should have been singing since kindergarten, but a man who doesn’t care whether the lying media thinks he knows the words, or not – he is so comfortable with the real American people, as they are with him, that he knows they know he knows them.
Political commentator Chuck Williams said, “It’s time we stopped looking for evidence of Donald Trump not being in complete possession of his faculties – because no-one cares.
“We elected a deranged reality-TV star with a track record of lecherous behaviour to lead the nation, the real people suffering mental issues are the voters.”