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Saudi Arabia has told Boris Johnson that he’s also a massive ‘puppeteer’ involved in proxy political wars simply to further his own agenda.
The move comes after Mr Johnson inadvertently said something known outside of politics as ‘the truth’ at a recent conference in Rome.
‘The truth’ sent foreign ministers into a panic with a Foreign Office representative issuing an immediate statement:
“Any suggestion that this accurate assessment of Saudi Arabia’s role in the Middle East is the official position of the government is wrong and misinterpreting the facts.
“All the other stuff that Boris has been saying over the last few weeks, that’s the bit we want you to remember please.”
King Salaman of Saudi Arabia added “Oh come on. Boris Johnson is accusing others of playing politics; this is a new low, even for him.
“I think we should cut off his hands.
He added “I think it is so sad what is happening in Europe at the moment. There are politicians who are twisting and abusing things to further their own objectives.
“There are not enough big characters if you ask me. Theresa May is a headless chicken without the first idea of how to dig herself out of this Brexit shit show, Boris Johnson is a complete and utter hypocritical buffoon and just who the fuck is Jeremy Corbyn. I’ve never even heard of him.”
In an effort to improve relations between the two allies the Foreign Office stated: “To reiterate, we fully support the sovereign right of Saudi Arabia to oppress women and religious minorities in exchange for lots of money.”
