Nigel Farage pays moving tribute to his own opinions

author avatar by 8 years ago

Nigel Farage has taken a step back from his relentless scapegoating of immigrants to pay a moving tribute to his own opinions.

Speaking to Robert Peston earlier today, he said: “My dislike of the EU is at the forefront of my mind on this sad day.

“I’m sure that everyone will join me in offering their thoughts and prayers for a pint this lunchtime.”

Mr Farage paid further tribute to his personal beliefs while thumbing through the obituaries in his local paper.

“There is a dark cloud hanging over us today that is very much like the dark cloud of uncontrolled immigration!”

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Addressing mourners at a funeral he’d found, the Ukip Leader went on to say, “The sadness you are feeling is almost the same as the sadness I feel about our loss of sovereignty and the way to EU is allowing uncontrolled migration make the UK a country I no longer recognise.”

Mr Farage is expected to spend the rest of the day in a hospice telling terminally ill patients about ‘a brighter future’ outside the EU.