Ted Cruz going to Hell after decision to abort presidential campaign

author avatar by 7 years ago

Republican Christian evangelicals have admitted that Ted Cruz will burn in Hell for all eternity after his decision to abort his presidential campaign yesterday.

Evangelic groups said he should have taken the campaign to term, no matter how unviable experts had claimed it now was.

American voter Chuck Williams told us,”I will pray for Ted, but I fear it won’t help. A presidential campaign is a gift from God, so what right does Ted Cruz have to terminate it on a whim?

“That campaign deserved to go to the convention, who knows what it may have become – but instead, Ted chose to throw it in the garbage like the Godless heathen he so clearly is.

“I don’t care that it was his campaign and it affected him more than it affected me, he should not have aborted it and I should be able to stop people from doing that in the future.

Campaigners from ‘Ted Cruz for President’ said the decision to terminate the campaign was not taken lightly.

As one explained, “Ted wrestled with his conscience for many hours on this issue, but ultimately he decided that a candidate’s right to choose outweighed the opinion of a bunch of religious fanatics who wouldn’t give a damn about the campaign once it had reached the convention.”

“He wasn’t about to take to term a campaign that nobody wants, just because some evangelical lunatics think it’s the right thing to do.

“And no, he doesn’t see the irony in that.”