Tuesday 11 September 2012

Surly Murray snubs Olympic thank you to pocket $1.9m payday


Miserable Scot Andy Murray gave an open-handed slap in the face to Olympic fans and volunteers in order to trouser $1.9m, claimed people who don’t like him this morning.

The Scottish tennis player chose to miss the London Olympics thank you parade, despite the help crowds of fans and volunteers  gave him on his way to winning a gold medal.

English person Simon Williams said, “Think of all the hours the fans and volunteers put in cheering him on and making London 2012 as good as it could be.”

“And how does he say thanks? By pissing off to New York to get paid nearly two million dollars.”

“I think that shows where his priorities lie, the money grabbing kilt wearing mercenary turd.”

“I hope everyone hates him as much as I do now.”

Andy Murray snub

Experts have said that, somewhat ironically, people who don’t like Andy Murray are today as miserable as Andy Murray.

As Professor Kevin Matthews of the People Research Centre explained, “It seems that for some, the pleasure derived from someone else’s failure is only matched by the misery felt at their success.”

“It also seems Andy Murray will never be universally liked, at least not by anyone who supports the England football team.”

“That said, I’m sure Andy Murray could take a look at his bank balance this morning and count all the fucks he doesn’t give.”

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