Everyone struggling to cope without Prosecco and Quality Street for breakfast

The first day back to work for people after Christmas has proven difficult due to many businesses in the country frowning on employees breakfasting on a glass of prosecco and a handful of Quality Street.

According to a recent survey, during the Christmas break, the number one choice for breakfast amongst British people is prosecco and chocolate, the number two choice is all the cheese, and number three is ‘whatever’s in the fridge because I’m not bloody going to Asda until it’s empty.’

Many people have found the transition back to a diet of a cup of coffee and a Pret egg sandwich a tricky one.

“I’m not allowed to drink wine at my desk, or so I’ve been told this morning,” explained air traffic controller Simon Williams.

“But I’ve really enjoyed a glass of prosecco and a toffee penny for breakfast over Christmas; it really sets you up for the day.

“I would imagine that they’re not going to be too happy about me starting lunch with a glass of whisky either.

“I think today’s going to be a tricky one.”

Health professionals have recommended replacing the prosecco/chocolate breakfast combination with a fruit smoothie or perhaps some organic porridge.

Mr Williams proved unreceptive to the advice.

“Health professionals can f**k off, then.” He said, echoing the thoughts of many.

Advertisement

NewsThumpNotebooks

Somewhere to write down everything that’s wrong with the world. You may need several.

See the full collection →