Donald Trump announces plan for US to join G1 group of countries
by Rich Smith 5 months ago 
US President Donald Trump has today outlined ambitious plans for the United States to leave the G7 and instead join the far more exclusive G1 group of countries, an international organisation consisting entirely of the United States.
The announcement came shortly after the conclusion of the latest G7 summit, during which Trump reportedly spent several exhausting hours listening to other world leaders insist that global problems require international cooperation.
Speaking to reporters as he boarded Air Force One, Trump said, “The G1 is going to be incredible. Probably the greatest international organisation in history. Some people are already saying it’s better than the G7, better than NATO, maybe even better than the United Nations.
“In the G7 you’ve got all these countries wanting to discuss tariffs, trade, wars, climate, Ukraine, security. Everybody’s talking. Frankly, too much talking.
“With the G1, we can get things done much faster because everyone already agrees with me.”
Trump went on to explain that meetings of the G1 could be arranged at extremely short notice.
“If I have an idea at three in the morning, we can hold an emergency summit immediately,” he explained. “No delays, no bureaucracy, no waiting for Canada to finish having feelings about something.”
White House officials confirmed that the inaugural G1 summit had already taken place aboard Air Force One during the flight home from the G7.
“The president chaired the meeting, delivered the keynote speech, approved the final communiqué and declared it a tremendous success,” said a spokesperson.
“The member nation unanimously agreed that all previous international agreements were terrible, that every future agreement will be historic, and that any country disagreeing with the G1 is probably very unfair.”
Sources close to the summit said the final communiqué consisted of a single sentence reading, “Whatever Donald thinks.”
Meanwhile, Prime Minister Keir Starmer is understood to be exploring the possibility of creating a G1.5 organisation, allowing Britain to remain closely aligned with the United States while still pretending it occasionally has an independent foreign policy.
Yet more NewsThump stories
Trump tackles voter concern over excessive cruelty in immigration policy by promoting man responsible for it
AI finally finds ‘true purpose’ in British society by helping people complain more efficiently
Businesses warn publishing salaries will attract applicants who are only interested in being paid
Those who insisted “innocent until proven guilty!” assert Russell Brand’s innocence despite proven guilt
Donald Trump appoints Lord Voldemort as Chief of Staff
