Man celebrates after successfully selling left kidney to pay for his daughter’s Harry Styles ticket

A man is celebrating today after successfully selling his left kidney in order to pay for a ticket for his daughter to see Harry Styles at Wembley. 

Simon Williams, who only needed one ticket, secured the deal earlier after receiving a very lucrative offer for his kidney, which just happened to be the same amount of money it would cost to send his daughter to Wembley, with a small Diet Coke included. 

Speaking earlier, he told us, “I got a really good deal, with the option to sell my other one, if Taylor Swift does another tour.

“I decided to sell my kidney as my daughter really wanted to see Harry Styles and all of her friends were going.

“I checked out the ticket price last night, and the cost of a drink at Wembley, and obviously it would be impossible for any normal person to afford without selling something significant.

“We couldn’t really sell the house, because we are mortgaged up to the eyeballs, so I decided to use my next best saleable asset. 

“It was the logical solution. Because you only really need one of them, and it will, I hope, be a really good gig.”

Asked where the seats are and if his daughter will be VIP, based on the cost of his tickets, we were told, “No. Standing. Pretty near the back, I think.

Advertisement

WANT TO GET RIDOF ALL THE ADS?

Support topical satire for the price of one coffee month!

SUBSCRIBE HERE →