Golf resort plan falls out of Trump’s pocket during Gaza redevelopment briefing

President Donald Trump has announced he wants the US to take over the Gaza Strip, initially keeping his plans tight-lipped until a design for a new golf course fell out of his pocket.

Despite constantly bemoaning foreign interference, Trump has decided to interfere abroad by displacing thousands of people from their homes and building a golf course in their place.

“This is definitely not for personal gain,” said Trump, taking a practice swing. 

“People are accusing me of ethnic cleansing, but do Palestinians not like golf? I’m doing them a favour when you think about it. They’ll all be thanking me when their handicap goes down, you mark my words.

“Obviously the club will have rules, like no Palestinians. But they can have access to the club if one of our members gives them a guest pass for the day. I’m not a monster. 

“Trust me. Taking over Gaza is exactly what the American people need right now. 

“Oh, and eggs. If people could send over some non-contaminated eggs that would be great.”

Trump announced his intentions to take over Gaza at a joint White House press conference alongside Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, who looked as shocked as anyone.

“I was not prepared for this surprising news,” said Netanyahu, hiding a putter behind his back. 

“Sounds kind of good though, right?”

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