Norwegian PM: ‘U wot m8?’

The Norwegian Prime Minister has escalated his text exchange with Donald Trump by replying ‘U wot m8?’ to the US president’s message demanding Greenland.

Yesterday it was revealed that Trump had replied to a text message sent by Norwegian Prime Minister Jonas Gahr Støre claiming the reason for his advances on Greenland was because he didn’t receive the Nobel Peace Prize, which eventually led to Støre losing his cool.

“It just felt right,” said Jonas Gahr Støre, sitting in his Stone Island jacket.

“He hasn’t said shit since I replied ‘U wot m8?’ Probably too scared to face me, the big fucking orange weapon. Honestly, if I ever see him down my ends again me and the boys will go full Viking on that dickhead. You get me?

“All I wanted was a civil conversation, man to man, hombre to hombre. But then he disrespects me? The cojones on this clown is crazy. He’s lucky I don’t fly over to Washington and slap him across the face with a massive salmon. 

“I’m not sure what his beef is with me. I don’t give out the Nobel Peace Prizes do I?

“I’ll tell you what I can give him though, my knuckles connecting with his jaw. He best watch himself, yeah?”

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