Donald Trump to spend second day of state visit throwing bricks at police outside migrant hotel

Donald Trump is set to spend the second day of his state visit to the UK standing outside a hotel housing asylum seekers whilst throwing bricks at police. 

Following a lavish reception at Windsor Castle last night hosted by the Royal Family, the US President will today be brought to a hotel in Epping, where he will be treated to a couple of hours of throwing bricks at police whilst threatening to torch the hotel. 

A spokesperson for government told us, “We are really pulling out all the stops here.

“Following yesterday’s visit to Windsor Castle, we have got another big treat for the President, which he may like even more.

“We have decided to take him to a small hotel in Epping, where he will be encouraged to throw a number of bricks at local police officers whilst shouting slurs at the migrants. We think it will make him feel right at home.

“Obviously we also want him to experience the best that Britain has to offer, and have a really good time.

“That’s why we will also be offering him a paintbrush and some paint, so he can deface some local roundabouts.”

Asked if there will be any other treats for the President before he flies back home, we were told, “Afternoon tea with Tommy Robinson.”

Advertisement

TopicalT-shirts

Wear your opinions and maybe even annoy a politician or two!

See the full collection →