Supermarkets unveil new ‘dynamic pricing’ for in-demand food, but will only let you know at the checkout

Supermarkets are to introduce a new ‘dynamic pricing’ for what they consider ‘in demand’ food items it has been revealed today – but they will only let you know about the price increase at the checkout.

With news emerging yesterday that Ticketmaster had grossly inflated ticket prices for Oasis gigs for ‘in demand’ tickets, supermarkets have now decided to do the same, given it appears to be really easy and perfectly legal to completely rip people off.

A spokesperson for the supermarket association told us, “Yeah we’re just going to double the price of a load of stuff just before they get their card out.

“We have decided to introduce a new ‘in demand’ price system in our supermarkets where we will have a look if other people are buying a particular product, like bread or something, and then double the price of it if a few more people are also in the store trying to buy bread.

“If Ticketmaster can do it, why can’t we?  It’s a bloody genius plan, really.  We will make loads more money.

“Obviously we won’t tell people the new cost of the bread until they have spent an hour doing the full weekly shop, loaded it onto the checkout and are just about to pay.

“That way, they will probably end up buying it, as they really want some bread, and it will feel like a big waste of time if they don’t go ahead and get the bread.”

Asked if he considers the new ‘dynamic pricing’ system just a little unfair we were told, “Oh, definitely – it’s 100% unfair. But fuck it,  it seems that you can just what you want these days.”

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