Man who shouted ‘leave it, he’s not worth it’ wins 2022 Nobel Peace Prize

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This year’s Nobel Peace Prize has been won by a man who shouted ‘Leave it, he’s not worth it!’ just as it was all about to kick off in his local pub.

Simon Williams, from Luton, was recognised by the Nobel committee for ‘a decisive and selfless intervention that almost certainly stopped somebody from getting knocked spark the f**k out’.

“A disagreement in The White Horse had been threatening to boil over all afternoon and, even with his friends attempting to hold him back, it became obvious that Steve was going to fill Gaz in. That was until Mr Williams intervened,” the committee said in a statement.

“His heroic and selfless actions are an example to us all, showing that everybody can have a part to play in reducing violence around the world, be that through exposing the corruption of despotic authoritarian regimes, or by stopping a tear-up in the local boozer on a Sunday evening.”

Although this particular act was singled out in the announcement of the award, Williams has a history of peacekeeping in and around Luton.

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His ‘It’s only a game lads’ speech from 2018 is widely credited with de-escalating tensions in the pool table region of the Red Lion, preventing several young men from getting lamped right in the face.