After Facebook and Google destroyed the market for balanced opinion and thoughtful comment, NewsThump has decided to jump on the bandwagon and join other media organisations chasing your rage clicks, and we’re starting by saying that thing you like is really stupid.
Yeah, we know you like it, and we recognise that it has brought you a lot of pleasure over the years, but I’m here to write words that make you angry and that means pointing out that your tastes are stupid and you like stupid things. Like an idiot.
I’ll be honest, I’m not even all that familiar with that thing you like, but that won’t stop me from making derogatory remarks about both it, and the people – like you – who enjoy it. Those people are all idiots. And you can quote me on that. In fact, please do quote me on that. To be frank, it would great if you would quote me. Preferably while sharing a snippet of this article as an illustration of just how angry you are.
There are a number of other peripheral things that are stupid, some of which you care about, but it’s important to remember that this one article is specifically about that thing that you like above all else. You can’t believe we think it’s stupid, but we can’t believe you’re stupid enough to like it.
Can you feel that rage building up inside you? Let it out. That anger is both useful to me and lucrative to my employers. Use it to berate me online, use it bang your fists against the table while you send the article to all of your groups on WhatsApp. Don’t forget to include the link.