A brave free-thinker has really stuck it the man this afternoon by tucking his facemask under his chin the moment he gained access to the supermarket to do his weekly shop.
Simon Williams, 35, has been telling anyone who will listen that masks are pointless after gaining all sorts of medical and virology expertise by visiting various YouTube rabbit holes for the last three weeks.
“Masks don’t do anything, they’re just a test to see how gullible the public is, and you’ve all fallen for it!
“They are trying to see how scared you all are, and clearly the answer is VERY! But not me, I educated myself and now I know better than all of you.
“The moment I was inside the supermarket I pulled mine down under my chin so I fully enjoy the sweet, sweet aroma of freedom. And the recycled air they pump around inside Sainsbury’s, but they are very similar.
“No, I haven’t taken the mask off completely, so I can always pull it back up if I see someone who looks like they could throw me out. Not that I’m willing to follow the rules, it’s just if I go home and I haven’t got everything on the list, the missus will make me sleep on the sofa again.
“So this way I get to stick it to the man, while also doing everything asked of me by the woman.”
Other shoppers have noticed Simon’s lack of mask, and the contents of his trolley, and been left wondering about his health-related choices.
As one explained, “He won’t wear a mask to potentially protect himself and others, but he will enjoy a diet filled with ready meals, fried food and sugary drinks and snacks?
“He needn’t worry about getting old enough to be vulnerable to coronavirus, I suspect heart disease will get him long before that’s an issue.”