Monday 1 June 2020 by Lucas Wilde

Karen fuming after request to see the manager met with “All complaints matter”


Karen told all complaints matter

Karen has been left fuming after her very important complaint was lumped in with all the others.

Karen Williams, 44, marched up to the counter at her local Shit-U-Buy with a size 14 garment that she was sure would fit, despite being a size 18 in every other store.

“I asked to see the manager, and the young lady told me to calm down, insisted that ‘all complaints matter’, and then NOTHING HAPPENED that actually helped me or changed anything,” raged Karen, who has been banned from eighteen separate branches of Starbucks.

“I KNOW all complaints matter, that’s obvious – but this is MY complaint and it’s the complaint that has been brought to the staff’s attention RIGHT NOW.

“So surely we can at least TALK about my specific complaint as opposed to it being dismissed as just one of many complaints that are important and then doing NOTHING about it?!

“I demand action be taken on my very specific complaint or so help me God I will not be held responsible for my actions. If you fob me off again with worthless platitudes I will burn this place to the ground!”

Observing a news report from the store’s television, Karen remarked, “Oh, those people are STILL kicking up a fuss over that dead black guy? Geez. Don’t they realise ALL lives matter?

“…why are you looking at me like that?”

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