Giant’s Milk Chai Latte is the latest addition to the range at Winterfell Starbucks, to help keep you warm through the endless winter.
The drink, which is dark and full of spices, contains milk from a ‘secret source’ and is guaranteed to help you grow up big and strong.
“Just drinking a mug of this will make you feel like a big baby again”, we were told. “Just don’t ask how we got it so frothy!”
The new drink marks a new start for the chain, which has had several disappointing failed launches in recent years.
“Our Targaryen coffee blend roast was a disappointing failure, as we tried roasting the beans with dragon fire and it had no effect at all”, said spokesman Simon Starkbuck.
“And then we tried the same trick to mull through our ‘Night King’ spicy iced beverage, and same thing. No effect.”
“Eventually we decided to entirely remove dragon fire from our production process, as it not only did it not work but also several people got eaten every week.
“Our staff turnover was worse than Burger King’s Landing.”