Parliament looks forward to nice, long holiday after EU grants Brexit extension

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MPs have breathed a sigh of relief and have started planning nice long holidays after the EU granted an extension to the Brexit process until October 31st.

There had been concern that the Brexit chaos would result in a series of small extensions that would have made it quite difficult for MPs to plan holidays.

“This is such a relief,” said Health Minister Mat Hancock.

“I, and a lot of my colleagues, were really starting to think that we wouldn’t get a holiday, which really is unthinkable.

“So the extension is great news for all of us. Personally, I’ve got some brochures for the Amalfi coast. Two months away from all this madness will be just the ticket.”

However, some Tory MPs have come in for criticism from their Labour counterparts for their plans.

“Typical Tories, planning two-month holidays to luxury destinations abroad in this time of national crisis,” spat Shadow Foreign Secretary Emily Thornberry.

“I will spend my two-month holiday touring Wales, because I’m in touch with the common people of this country and that’s where they think I should be.”

It is expected that MPs will reconvene in mid-October to bicker about the ‘will of the people’ and then not agree about the withdrawal agreement, which will be defeated by parliamentary vote a minimum of three times.

Unless, of course, Theresa May comes back from her walking holiday with another ‘idea’.

In which case we could end up adopting communism or asking to be annexed by Japan or some other mad old nonsense.