Prince Charles has said that when he becomes King he will only discuss promoting the use of homeopathy with his plants.
The next in line to the throne was asked if he would continue to put forward bonkers theories when he becomes the monarch, to which he replied, “Absolutely not – I shall limit the promotion of bonkers theories and pseudoscience to my many plants.
“They are a wonderful audience, such good listeners, and they don’t judge me. I’ve never once had a plant tell me to shut and stop talking a load of old bollocks.
“Did you know plants can’t walk away from you when you’re talking to them. Fascinating things.
“Yes, so I’ll just do all my talking to the plants when I become King.”
The Palace has moved to respond to the comments, with an official spokesperson telling us, “Oh Charles’s such an idiot – everyone knows the Queen is giving the job straight to William.”