Monday 15 October 2018 by Neil Tollfree

IT department announces split due to ‘artistic differences’


IT department to break up

The IT department at Hadley and Kemp Insurance Ltd has announced that it will be splitting up.

A statement issued by the department thanked fans for their support, insisted the department were still friends and claimed that they had split due to ‘artistic differences.’

“It’s a shame, but we’ve had a good run,” said department manager Simon Williams.

“I mean, it’s been eleven years. Most IT departments have one good project, maybe a few popular software upgrades and then comes the huge, acrimonious split over money or a girl or something.

“I’m very proud of our eleven-year run, and the fact that we will be going our separate ways still as the mates we always were when we set the IT department up back in Art College.”

However, other members of the IT department have claimed that the split wasn’t so friendly.

“Artistic differences my balls,” claimed one team member who wished to remain anonymous.

“It was Sim – all he wanted to do was go out to parties, mingle with the big-shots. He’d forgotten why we put this IT department together in the first place.

“To do something different, edgy. IT departments had become stale, part of the establishment, and we were the antidote to that, we were young and didn’t play by the rules. Now Si is the establishment.

“It’s sad really, he’s become everything he hated.”

The department will officially split at the end of the year, after putting out one last software patch.

Simon Williams will be perusing a solo career and the rest of the department have made no announcement as to their plans, but have not ruled out setting up a new IT department.

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