US to withdraw from UN Human Rights Council after UN refuses to reclassify Mexicans as sub-human

Donald Trump will take the United States out of the UN’s Human Rights Council after it steadfastly refused to reclassify Mexican immigrants as sub-human.

The Trump administration is likely to blame the withdrawal from the council on other nations insisting that Mexicans are human beings and deserving of basic human rights, in direct opposition to his government’s official position.

Trump told reporters, “The failing United Nations can’t do anything, they keep on saying Mexicans are humans too, but we know different, don’t we folks.

“I’ll be honest, human rights have been a pain in my ass ever since I moved into the White House, but not any longer.

“Apparently you can’t go around putting human children in cages, even when these kids are Mexicans – I mean, everyone knows Mexicans are animals, not human; what’s the big deal?”

President Trump went on to try and calm his opponents who were angry at the news, insisting this wasn’t the end of human rights in the United States of America.

He explained,”Look, we’re going to make our own Human Rights Council, and it will be the best Human Rights Council in the world, the very best, lots of people will be saying so.

“Anyone will be able to submit an application, but we will be very choosy about who we let be classified as human – we have to be. None of these immigrant sorts, or the Muslims. None of those, obviously.”

Meanwhile, many Trump supporters have taken to looking at themselves in the mirror this morning and asking themselves the question, “What…what if we’re the baddies?”

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