Harry and Meghan have told people wanting to get them a wedding present that they’d rather have the cash.
The royal couple has decided to shun convention, and have chosen not to wander around John Lewis scanning things they might need to furnish their new home – given their home is already a literal palace.
However, they have decided a nice honeymoon sounds pretty good to them, and that if everyone gave them cash instead they could have enough to buy their own island.
A palace insider told us, “Harry and Meghan are pretty informal, and hate the idea of their friends and well-wishers having a hard time trying to buy a present for someone who literally lives in a castle.
“So they have decided instead to ask for cash. No amount is recommended, they just say that if you feel like it, give them a few quid and they’ll put it towards a honeymoon they’ll never forget. Like maybe buying Fiji, or that nice bit of Australia.
“No, it doesn’t matter how much you give them, you won’t get to see the honeymoon photos of Meghan in a skimpy bikini, sorry.”
Many British citizens have subsequently asked, “Haven’t I donated enough to that bloody family already?”
Windsor resident Simon Williams told us, “How about they get married and live happily ever after, and I get to keep the money I worked hard for and don’t get made to feel bad because I don’t give it to whoever they think I should. Deal?”