Elon Musk to be launched into space to retrieve sunglasses left in Tesla

author avatar by 6 years ago

American entrepreneur and future Bond villain Elon Musk will later today be shot into space to collect the Ray-Bans he left in his red Tesla roadster.

The car was launched with the Falcon Heavy on 6 February for no apparent reason whatsoever.

The madman billionaire didn’t realise he’d left his favourite sunglasses in the glove compartment until he went to put them on to watch the launch.

“It’s a double kick in the teeth for me,” said Musk. “Not only have I lost my favourite glasses, I also couldn’t watch the launch because the sun and thrust flames were too bright.”

It is also reported that Musk left a U2 album in the car, but does not plan on retrieving it when he gets there.

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Musk plans to launch himself into space to get them back with typical showmanship.

“I’ve built a very large hydrogen-powered catapult in my garden – it is as gorgeous to look at as it is terrifying to be fired from, and that should propel me to the car so I can get the glasses. I just need to remember to take my car keys, or I’ll have to come back and do it again,” he said.

Musk plans to continue to Mars after picking up the glasses, since, according to sources close to him, “he’s from another planet anyway.”