World famous lover Pepe le Pew has died after a short illness, we can report.
le Pew, who rose to fame for his womanising in the 1950s and 60s, claimed to have ‘lurved ‘undrerds and undrerds of beautiful ladies” during his life.
He was known for his forthright and enthusiastic approach to love, often simply showering women with kisses in the hope they would succumb.
However, critics of Pepe described him as a ‘skunk’ who actually didn’t like women and whose incessant pursuit of women indicated a deep insecurity.
“There was always a bad smell about Pepe,” said leading feminist Simone Williams.
“When I met him for a Channel Four documentary in the 1980s he refused to answer any questions and just tried to get my top off.
“And I’ll never forgive him for what he did to my cat after it had an accident with some white paint.”
Hollywood star Jonny Depp paid tribute to le Pew, saying that he learned everything he knows about personal hygiene and amour from Pepe.