Jeremy Corbyn to use conference to really draw attention to his ignoring of Brexit

author avatar by 6 years ago

Leader Jeremy Corbyn will use the platform of the Labour conference in Brighton to really take his ignoring of Brexit to a new level.

Many commentators believe that Labour’s strong performance in the election earlier this year was down to a strict unity in ignoring Brexit and a laser-like focus on anything that isn’t Brexit.

“Yeah, I’m really looking forward to conference this year,” said Labour supporter and credulous naïf Simon Williams.

“As a staunch supporter of Jeremy, I’m hoping for a good few days of singing ‘Ooo, Jeremy Corbyn’ and ignoring Brexit.

“People say that, as a Government in waiting, we can’t spend the entire Labour conference completely ignoring Brexit, but then people also said we’d get annihilated at the last election.

“We can surprise you.”

Shadow Chancellor John McDonnell was in buoyant mood as he greeted assembled press whilst sat in a deckchair with his trouser legs rolled up and a knotted hankie on his head.

“We have the largest party in Europe, Jeremy is a Prime Minister in waiting, and I’m staying fifty yards away from a brilliant whelks stall.

“We’ve also got some really ingenious new ways of ignoring Brexit, like this one for example.”

Mr McDonnell then shouted ‘Look,’ and pointed out to sea and by the time everyone turned back round after not seeing anything, he was running off down the sea-front.