The value of human life has plummeted against the pound following reports that government ministers failed to act on expert warnings about inadequate fire safety rules.
Despite government assurances that lessons they’ve ignored will be learned, the public’s confidence in the value of their own lives is at an all time low.
“A tragedy that the government will promise to do everything it can to stop happening again could happen at any time,” said Health and Safety Brigade spokesman Simon Williams.
“It’s like an avoidable accident waiting to happen.”
A Downing Street spokesman urged patience while investigations take place.
“We must wait until the experts we’ve previously ignored have carried out an investigation similar to the ones we’ve dismissed in the past,” he said.
“The government is very clear that it is doing everything it can to stop this happening again.”
Despite the value of life falling, the markets remain buoyant as trading in human suffering continues.
“Anyone who says nothing good ever comes from war clearly hasn’t seen my investment portfolio,” said one investment banker.