Tuesday 25 October 2011 by Spacey

Sven Goran Eriksson begins search for new severance deal

After leaving Leicester City by mutual consent, manager Sven Goran Eriksson has told reporters that the search is already underway for his next lucrative severance deal.

Eriksson, who has guided Leicester to mid-table obscurity after spending heavily in the summer, will be keeping a keen eye on developments at any club in the process of being taken over by a Far East consortium.

“My record of promising so much, but failing to deliver speaks for itself,” insisted the 63 year-old Swede.

“I’ve had a great relationship with all the boards that I’ve worked under and we’ve agreed on everything.”

“They say ‘Sven, we don’t think you’re up to the job’ and I agree with them.”

“They say ‘Sven, we’re going to write a figure down on a piece of paper that we think is a reasonable severance deal’, I look at the figure and I agree with them.”

Sven sacked

The former Man City and England manager’s agent has insisted that the search for an enormous payout will start immediately.

He told reporters, “Sven has made it clear to me that being paid vast quantities of cash as a result of dismal failure is in his in blood.”

“He wants to get started immediately on building a team at a new club that will go on to achieve great things for his bank balance.”

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