Thursday 14 April 2016

Amy Schumer calls for Bono to step up and fight Anthony Joshua


Bono to fight Anthony Joshua

Amy Schumer has claimed that the only way to beat world heavyweight champion Anthony Joshua is for Bono to step up and take him on in the ring.

Schumer was speaking to boxing journalists who for some unfathomable reason decided to ask her opinion about something not even remotely in her field of expertise.

She told them, “It seems clear to me that traditional methods of taking on Joshua – training really hard, practising punching things, then hitting him directly – have all failed miserably.

“If anything, he’s gotten stronger by people trying to fight him in precisely the way he expects to be fought. Going in there and boxing with him is playing right into his hands.

“It’s time for a new approach, and I for one think the only way to beat Joshua is through the power of rock ballad, and maybe a few sanctimonious speeches about the impact the West is having on the developing world.

“Oh, and maybe throw in a couple of tips on tax avoidance, too? To keep him off-balance.”

Those people hoping to see Joshua defeated have spoken up in the support of the plan.

Boxing fan Simon Williams told us, “It sounds completely ridiculous, like a plan from the mouth of a simpleton, but it might just work.

“Either Joshua is defeated, or we get to see Bono lose his glasses and several teeth from a crushing right-hook delivered from a world-class heavyweight boxer.

“It’s the very definition of win-win.”

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