Adele’s new album ’30’ to be about really long hangovers and trying to save for a house deposit

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Singer Adele is back after a six-year absence and she’s tackling the issues faced by people in their thirties – such as having a banging headache for three days after a small G&T.

Adele is back with her latest age-based album. This time it’s all about navigating the tricky age of thirty.

“Yeah, I do regret starting the whole age thing,” said the megastar.

“Sometimes I just want to write a song about, I dunno, cheese or something, but it’s difficult to hang that on a particular phase of life.

“Ah well, it is what it is.”

Adele talked us through some of her new songs:

Still Hurting

“Fuck me, I can’t drink no more. Half a bottle of Merlot and I’m fucked for a week. The title refers to those headaches that linger for days no matter how much Solpadeine you rub into your gums.”

Fly The Nest

“Loads of people my age are still living with their parents because they can’t afford to get on the property ladder.

“I know exactly how they feel because I had to buy a mansion in LA because my accountant advised me against buying in London cos of capital gains or something.”


“This one’s about finding your first grey hairs and just trying to own it and make it into something beautiful – even though you feel so old that you start Googling appointments at Dignitas.”

Click Click Click

“This sounds like a really upbeat number but it’s all about the decay of the human body. The percussion track is actually based on a sample of my knees clicking as I crouched down to pick up a pen.”

Easy On Me

“The first single. The record company wanted me to come back with a big ballad about a doomed relationship – they said it would be ‘on brand’.

“But listen to the words carefully and you’ll realise it’s about cheese.”