Jeremy Corbyn thanks Theresa May for yesterday’s sterling work

author avatar by 6 years ago

Jeremy Corbyn has sent Theresa May a thank you note and a fruit basket after a speech from the PM that could be politely described as an absolute clusterfuck.

“Jeremy had an absolute blinder of an afternoon yesterday,” confirmed a Labour spokesperson.

“He was sat in front of the television with a cup of tea and a selection of plain digestives, absolutely roaring with laughter.

“He chuckled slightly at her Vader-esque voice, then guffawed when she was handed a boiled sweet, then cackled when the set collapsed behind her, and by the time the P45 gag was done, he was rolling around on the floor.

“Honestly, he’s never had this much fun outside of a Hornby train set.”

A spokesperson for the Prime Minister said, ‘Mrs. May would like to politely remind Mr. Corbyn, and I quote, “I can still have you killed, fuck-boy’.

“It’s uncharacteristically aggressive of her, but to be honest she had a hell of a day.

“Anyway, cheers for the fruit basket, we’ll put it next to the one from Boris.”