AC/DC drummer avoids jail for trying to procure dirty deeds dirt cheap

author avatar by 9 years ago

AC/DC drummer Phil Rudd has been spared jail after being arrested for trying to get dirty deeds done dirt cheap, we can report today.

The court described Rudd as a cold hearted man with a mean streak, but acknowledged he’d fallen on hard times after his show business career faltered.

After turning to drugs, Rudd was all screwed up and had a brain shake, leading him to try to engage some guns for hire for ruff stuff.

The Drummer’s plans were shot down in flames after it turned out police had a fly on the wall.

“I was thunderstruck when I saw Phil in the box,” said the judge.

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“Hells bells!” I thought.

“I know some sin for nothing, but Phil’s money talks. Clearly he’s a problem child, but I’m going to give him a second chance.”

“If we lock him up he’ll only stage a jailbreak anyway.”

However, some have criticised the decision as all screwed up, saying that Rudd is a danger and as hard as a rock.

Responding to the news, Rudd said “I’m a rebel, but I’m back in business. It’s a dog eat dog world, so someone fetch me a big gun.”