Council inspectors who have been rifling through the bins of honest families throughout the country now appear to be preying upon celebrities who tell lies, the Daily Mail has revealed.
The paper claims that local authorities only target particularly evil public figures who are suspected of throwing away bundles of £50 notes they use for snorting cocaine.
“The money would have been covered with the drug and with their DNA from the blood of their cocaine-ravaged noses,” said reporter James Graham.
“So these celebrities were disposing of it before the gutter press, you know, like The News of the World, could get hold of it.”
The Daily Mail only managed to obtain the information ‘through the Freedom of Information Act’.
“And we’re only allowed to publish this information because of the freedom of the press in this country,” Graham added.
“And long may it continue.”