Families across America will spend this evening giving thanks for everything they have, before waking up tomorrow morning prepared to kill for lots of things they don’t really need.
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After Donald Trump pardoned a Thanksgiving turkey yesterday, it has been revealed he only did so after the turkey agreed to testify it had been witness to ballot tampering in the recent presidential election.
The mighty Kraken, leviathan of the deep, girt in oceanic majesty, has been found washed up and dead on the coast just south of Beach Haven this morning.
Donald Trump has appeared to accept that a transition from fantasyland to reality will need to begin.
Keep up with the latest bouts of catastrophic
bellendry from all around the world.
