Donald Trump has announced a new social media platform named after the Soviet publication synonymous with propaganda, and none of this is remotely surprising.
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Following the invocation of the Pope’s authority by pro-pestilence campaigners in Colchester, the Vatican has clarified its position on utter drongs whose desperate quest for attention leads them to spout off tripe clearly put on Facebook by teenage trolls.
A comic fan has today announced his extreme disappointment that the new Superman is bisexual, insisting the character should be as straight as they come, despite all the evidence to the contrary.
Boris Johnson is holidaying in typically British fashion.
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