World

Body of Aquaman washed up on Irish beach with stomach full of plastic

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Children, nerdy adults and weirdos are in a state of mourning today, following confirmation that a body washed up on a beach in Ireland yesterday was that of DC Superhero, Aquaman.

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Chinese probe to dark side of the moon accidentally lands on Decepticon base

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Megatron and the rest of the Decepticons are ‘royally hacked off’ after a Chinese moon-probe landed slap bang on top of their secret base, we can reveal.

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Mexico selfishly shuts down US government by refusing to pay for the Wall

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As the US government shutdown continues, Mexico is being encouraged to stop being so selfish and pay for the wall so everyone can get back to work.

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Donald Trump starts referring to himself as a war veteran after spending five minutes in Iraq

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President Trump has declared that he is now a war veteran following a quick visit to the US troops stationed in Iraq.

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Donald Trump announces Darth Vader as new Secretary of Defence

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Donald Trump has stunned Republican and Democrat officials alike with his appointment of Darth Vader as his new Secretary of Defence.

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Vladimir Putin tells May it is her duty to ‘deliver on the will of the Russian president’

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Russian president, Vladimir Putin yesterday told British Prime Minister Theresa May to ensure his democratic will is honoured by making sure the United Kingdom leaves the European Union.

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Santa warns that some toys won’t be ready due to elves spending all their time dicking about on shelves

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Santa Claus has issued a warning that some toys may not be ready in time for delivery due to some ‘staffing issues’ at the North Pole.

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Tourist from Iowa becomes Donald Trump’s new Chief of Staff

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The Trump administration has once again stunned the Washington establishment with the unusual move of making Mick Mulvaney, a car tools salesman from Dubuque, the second most powerful man in the US after the tourist lingered too long in the West Wing during a guided visit.

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‘Mary Poppins Returns’ slammed for failing to include Yondu

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Fans expecting to see Yondu return from the dead in Mary Poppins Returns have been left bitterly disappointed after studio bosses inexplicably failed to include the popular character.

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Donald Trump threatens to shut down the federal government if Mexico refuses to pay for his wall

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US President Donald Trump has threatened to shut down the federal government if Mexico refuses to pay for his border wall, even though he promised the American people they would.

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