After discovering that people who don’t listen to the advice of doctors cost the NHS £11bn a year, new guidelines will allow medical professionals to give these people much cheaper fake advice to ignore instead.
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The Labour Party has successfully completed a purge of a radical right-wing group calling itself ‘the electorate’ this week.
Following the Party’s re-establishment of Jeremy Corbyn as their leader, challenger Owen Smith has been declared an unperson.
Comrade Corbyn’s victory is doubleplusgood and otherthinkwise is thoughtcrime, the Labour Party has confirmed.
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