Brexit to make everyone poorer except lawyers, confirm lawyers
Lawyers have rejected claims that Brexit will make everyone poorer, saying it’s going tremendously well as far as they’re concerned.
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Simon Cowell wins X Factor for record 13th time
Simon Cowell shocked morons everywhere last night by dramatically securing his thirteenth successive victory in ITV’s X Factor.
X Factor winner secures five-minute record deal and 2017 panto run
Following his X Factor win, Matt Terry is preparing for a year in which he will end up in a panto after being dropped by Simon Cowell’s record label.
‘Just about managing’ defined as those with a grand to spend on leather trousers
Britons are pissing their hard-earned cash up the wall on leather kecks, according to reports.
