UK

‘There was no way to predict these issues with Northern Ireland protocol’ explains man to millions of people who predicted precisely these issues with Northern Ireland Protocol

Northern Ireland secretary Chris Heaton-Harris is leading the charge to unilaterally change the terms of the Northern Ireland Protocol, insisting there was no way to predict how it has turned out, despite being surrounded by millions of people who accurately predicted exactly how it has turned out.

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John Lewis foster family to ask for a child who likes Lego next Christmas

John Lewis has launched its new Christmas advert with the heart-warming message that middle-aged men need safer hobbies.

Labour supporters keen to break habit of a lifetime and vote for a Tory

Millions of Labour supporters will be hoping that a Tory wins tonight, and every night, as they prepare to vote for a Tory in the hope he will have to eat a kangaroo’s arsehole.

Man unhappy with swearing allegiance to the King

Nurses are ‘far too important to be allowed to strike’ insists man who also believes they’re not important enough to be paid properly

Nurses should not be allowed to take strike action because they are too important to the nation’s health, according to a man who simultaneously believes they aren’t important enough to be given a proper pay rise.

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