Conservative MP Nadine Dorries has told reporters that David Davis is the perfect man to negotiate the nation’s exit from the EU because she once saw him throw a kettle over a pub.
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Daily Mail editor Paul Dacre is to retire later this year and relinquish his soul to Satan as specified in the contract he signed when selling it some 26 years ago.
Tommy Robinson has had his application to become the next Daily Mail editor turned down – because he’s too left wing for their readership.
Gammon can apparently come in vegan form now, according to reports.
Keep up with the latest bouts of catastrophic
bellendry from all around the world.
