Downing Street special advisers have smaller than average brains, finds study
A scientifically robust study has found that government advisers have weird shaped skulls and small brains.
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World’s bellends demand instant vaccine as Coronavirus hits iPhone production
Planet Earth’s dickheads have demanded an instant vaccine against that Covid-19 thing as it emerged that a deceased Chinese workforce could substantially delay the rollout of the new iPhone.
EU can shove its generous flood defence fund insist Brexiters up to their necks in water
Partially submerged Brexit voters have told the EU to stick their flood defence funds ‘where the sun don’t shine’ – or ‘England’ as it is more commonly known.
Met Office hoping that £1.2 billion investment in new supercomputer delivers more than ’42’
The Met Office will be hoping for something considerably more tangible than “42” after newly appointed business secretary, Alok Sharma, announced a spend of £1.2 billion pounds on a new weather supercomputer.
