“Watch your tone” says man presumably unaware that everyone bellows “Twat!” the second he’s on television
Matt Hancock has told a female MP to watch her tone after she politely inferred he was full of it.
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Lockdown and social distancing isn’t necessary if you are really horny, insists Professor Neil Ferguson
The man behind the advice that led the government to lock down the country and implement strict social distancing rules has insisted they don’t apply when ‘daddy really horny’.
The restriction of freedom of movement shouldn’t be a hard concept for you to grasp, police tell Nigel Farage
Police have been surprised to see that Nigel Farage has now rallied against restrictions on his freedom of movement, as they had always thought this was something he would be into.
Nurse delighted she can finally pay her bills with ‘applause’
Nurse Simone Williams has thanked the public for their ongoing weekly round of applause, after saving enough applause to pay her mortgage this month.
